I’ve been feeling very introspective lately, wanting to do nothing but read and write. Unfortunately a full class and work load doesn’t exactly lend itself to much of that. I’m hoping to start utilizing my tumblr more to get those short and brief thoughts out there in cyberworld and out of my head. But until then, my thought for tonight: As much as you’d like, you simply can’t live their lives for them…

It’s so easy for me to get caught up in the to-do lists of my life and to forget the actual living part of it all. With that comes the whole “just going through the motions” thing as well. It becomes too easy for my personal time with the Lord to become just another item on my agenda for the day and not a moment of my day where I’m really just spending time with Him. I hate that about myself. And then, when things start to spin out of my control I inevitably get upset and think “But I’m spending time with You every day! I’m doing everything just like I’m supposed to! Why?!” When in fact I already know the answer, I’m not actually spending quality time with Him at all. It’s not that I’m supposed to do anything. It should be that I yearn to.

I like to think of it as a date, a date with my Father. That seems to help. Taylor and I have this little rule if you will that when we go out on an actual date, we put our phones away. And keep them away. Without our phones we don’t have any temptation to not spend that time together. It’s really important to us to enjoy the time we have together since our lives are so crazy and hectic. That’s how it needs to be in my personal time with the Lord too. Sometimes I’m really good at this. Sometimes I’m not. But how can I expect to get anything deeply meaningful out of my time with God if I’m not pouring anything and everything into it? This amazing, life-changing relationship with God is only possible because he first pursued me. However, it’s only going to grow to it’s fullest potential if I pursue him back. Just like any healthy relationship, it’s a 2-way street.

Again on my drive home last night God spoke to me in a deeply powerful and uplifting way through my phone’s shuffle of songs. This has become a prayer of mine, a reminder to shut out the world and to pour into God.

I’m turning the world off, embracing the silence
Walking away from all the voices that are screaming in my ear.
I’ve been too caught up, I’ve been so stressed out,
And all of the noise replaced the whisper that used to be so clear.

So I’ll close every door
And put my face back on the floor.
And I’m in Your arms, where I belong,
There’s no other place for me than right where You are.
Some things just don’t change,
When I call Your name
You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace
When I’m in Your arms.

I’m letting my fears go, giving You control.
For You are the one who holds me closest in my soul’s darkest night.
Everything I see is so temporary
So help me to run the race before me with eternity in sight.

Now I close every door
And put my face back on the floor.
And I’m in Your arms, where I belong,
There’s no other place for me than right where You are.
Some things just don’t change,
When I call Your name
You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace
When I’m in Your arms.

To sit at Your feet, at Your table of mercy,
To gaze at Your beauty, my Lord.
To drink from Your well and be changed by Your glory,
Jesus, how could I ask for more?

Than to be in your arms, where I belong,
There’s no other place for me than right where You are.
Some things just don’t change,
When I call Your name
You never hesitate to wrap me in endless grace
When I’m in Your arms.

In Your Arms - Meredith Andrews

I know it’s long, but I really felt like every part of it applied to me. It’s too easy for me to get caught up in my stress and to stop putting myself at His mercy and direction in every aspect of my life. My prayer is to daily submit myself, every part of myself, to his control. And to put all my trust in my great, great God.

“And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” - Romans 8:28

I write with a heavy heart tonight. I am feeling more burdened and defeated than I have in a long time, if not ever. I’m not even sure where to begin…there is so much I want to say, yet I’m scared to. So much that I need to say, but I’m not quite sure how.

My heart breaks for this world. A few weeks ago I made my prayer for God to break my heart for what breaks His. And it hurts. I’m not anywhere near where I know I need to be in this aspect but I can’t imagine the pain he must feel watching his creation reject him again and again. I hate that I can’t save the world or be there for everyone. I hate watching people hurt and knowing that if only they would fall into my Father’s loving arms that it would all somehow be okay and yet, they won’t. I hate not knowing what to say at every moment in time when someone is hurting. I feel like a broken record player sometimes yet it seems so simple; turn to God.

I’m not a Christian because someone told me I should be. I’m not a Christian because I have to be. I’m not a Christian because it keeps people off my back or because it’s something to put under my religious status on facebook. I’m not a Christian because my parents are or because I’m naive about the other religions of the world. I’m not a Christian because of the social status it brings. It’s not a hobby for me or an orgranization to belong to. I am a Christian because it is more than just a religion, but because it has saved my life. I am a Christian because my Jesus is the only thing in this world that always makes sense, the only person who has never failed me, and never will. I am a Christian because the Spirit’s guidance is the peace that gets me through the trials of this world. I am a Christian because my Father’s love is so gracious and merciful to me, a dirty, filthy, sinner undeserving. I constantly turn to the creation rather than the creator yet He catches me every time I fall. THAT is why I am a Christian. And why my heart desires and yearns for others to share in that faith with me. I have such a deep anger for churches and believers who have hurt the hearts of those in their doors and have turned them away from the gospel. My prayer daily is for God to soften my heart towards them, to love them like he does.

I become so burdened with my hopes and desires for the people of this world. For my students I minister to, for those close to my heart who have looked for everything to fill that void and yet they’re still miserable. Everything within me wants to do something to save them and on a daily basis God shows me that it’s not me, but that it is him. There is nothing I can do but to be a vessel for God’s mercy, love and grace. It is such an incredible blessing and honor that God has chosen me to show His love to His people. Unfortunately I’m not always the best at this. I let the world get in the way of my ministry. It is impossible for me to point others to Christ if I’m also standing in the way of their view. I desire with everything within me to daily become a better light, a better example of Christ and his unfailing love.

The song “Lead Me” by Sanctus Real has had a very special meaning to me for quite sometime now. On my drive home tonight it become even more special to me as I realized that that needed to become my prayer every single day. I played that song on repeat for 20 minutes and prayed and cried and rejoiced in God’s mercy and grace for my life.

“Father give me the strength to be everything I’m called to be.
Oh Father show me the way to lead them.
Won’t you lead me?
To lead them with strong hands, to stand up when they can’t,
don’t want to leave them hungry for love, chasing things that I could give up.
I’ll show them I’m willing to fight, and give them the best of my life…

Father lead me ‘cause I can’t do this alone.”

This is my prayer, for all the students that I minister to now and for all the students that will ever come into my life. This is my prayer for my friends who are too hurt to let go right now. This is my prayer for those who don’t know You and never have, for those who used to be fighting the fight, that they would get back into battle.

So here I am, ready to follow your lead.

Hello dear friends. I apologize for the neglect of the blog; I’ve been awful, I know. But don’t you worry your pretty little hearts out, I have many many things that I’m working on and there are many postings coming your way very soon. Life is a beautiful and terrifying, constantly changing adventure. My life is midst many changes right now and many changes that must be documented. Until then however, I want to leave you with an amazing blog to read by a dear friend of mine. This blog spoke words of truth into my life and my ministry; it is full of great things to remember for all of us called to advancing The Kingdom.

Enjoy! And I shall see you again soon.

http://www.studentlife.com/blog/?p=455

WHEW! Where to even begin??? Well, we’re loading up tomorrow afternoon and driving 8ish hours to the beautiful Orange Beach. 3 camps down, 11 more to go. It is absolutely crazy thinking that our time at Covenant is down for now. It has been amazing, to say the least. Some of us were talking today and we have the best of both worlds, going from the mountains to the beach. I am more than excited for our 6 weeks/8 camps at the beach. It’s going to be quite the ride!

God has definitely been teaching me, growing me, and stretching me while we’ve been at Covenant. I love when God brings all these questions to mind and then makes you wait for answers. No doubt: he has quite the sense of humor. But as I have been learning, it’s worth the wait. I’m excited to look back in August and see where I am in comparison to where I started. God has been rocking my world lately and it’s only camp three! As a staff we’ve been studying through Romans every morning which is truly amazing; I’m finding myself more and more eager every day to dig in to God’s words and to see where it takes us. My love for God and my amazement in his everlasting love, mercy and grace has grown more than I ever thought possible since we’ve started Romans. I am in amazement at his love for us. For so long I’ve looked at God’s mercy on us in the simplest way and now that I’m realizing how intricate it is it makes me appreciate it even more. I cannot wait to get home and share all that I’ve learned with everyone.

For now though, I must stop procrastinating and start packing up my life. I love and miss you all!

Hello! Greetings from Georgia! I’m sorry that it has taken so long to get another post up here but any free time I have had lately has been spent sleeping or doing laundry. But, I’m here now! This is going to be quick but I just wanted to check in with you all!

First and foremost, your prayers have been greatly felt and much appreciated. We are nearing the end of our second camp of the summer and it is only because God is working through us that we have been successful thus far. We have experienced our fair share of difficulties but our team has bonded together and pulled through them all. I have been truly blessed with a wonderful team that I already consider family. They all mean the world to me and will forever have a special place in my heart.

Last week we had Jeremy Kingsley here sharing the Word with us and he is a fantastic guy. I absolutely loved him. And this week we are being encouraged by the great Sam Bhatt. They are both wonderful guys and have encouraged our staff beyond belief. Brett Younker has been leading us in worship these past two weeks which has been a huge blessing. Brett and all the guys are absolutely wonderful, I love them all. They truly lead us all into worship each evening. Shameless plug: Brett’s CD comes out on iTunes in 2 or 3 days, The New Has Come, GET IT! Check it out! It’s a wonderful treat for your ears :) I’ve got mine, what about you???

The campers have been wonderful. We could not have asked for a better group of students for our first week of camp. I formed relationships with some of the sweetest girls and was so blessed to see how God moved in their lives. My prayers are continually with them as they continue to seek out God and his will for their lives.

After this camp ends on Sunday we have a 24 hr turn around and begin camp 3 of 14 on Monday. After that, it’s off to Orange Beach! Covenant has been wonderful, a true blessing, and one of the best places to seek out God and to ask ourselves what he requires of us.

Thank you again for all of your prayers, they are true blessings. Please keep praying for rest for our entire team, that we wake up each day yearning for God to speak to us in a new and amazing way so that we are able to pour that love out on the students that we encounter.

Secondly, please keep all the students of One Group in your prayers as they head to Windermere to see my dear friends on the BLUE TEAM! Holla! I know they’ll be touched in an amazing way. I just pray that all distractions are taken away from them so that they experience the most wonderful encounter with our Creator.

And lastly, I have begun praying that God would start to prepare a wonderful group of people for me to come home to. I pray that I would be immediately placed in a group of amazing college students that continue to challenge me and my faith just as I’m being challenged here and that my faith would only continue to grow upon returning home; that I am placed in a college bible study that forces me to grow and search and work towards bettering my relationship with the Almighty. Also, that I am able to be a better and bolder witness at MOSO once I return home.

I love you all and miss you greatly!

Well, it’s hard to believe that I’ve already been here almost a month. It literally feels like just yesterday I was walking blindly into this crazy journey of a summer. But, 3 weeks later and the rehearsal period has come to a close. Sunday I will be loading up my bags and heading to Talladega with the rest of the 2010 SL summer staff for training week and from there we’ll be heading to Covenant College for our first camp of the 2010 season. AH! It is so crazy to think that the time is here.

These last three weeks of rehearsal have been absolutely amazing. I was completely terrified walking into it and these three weeks alone have made this summer worth it. I have grown so much as a person, an artist, and most importantly a follower of Jesus Christ. The lessons that I have learned and the spiritual guidance that I have received, the support that I have been given through wonderful people and God’s word are indescribable. I wish I could tell you every moment in detail but that would take more time than any of us have to spare. If I had to pick the one thing that means the most to me from these three weeks it would be the spiritual confirmation in my passion for theatre. I have never been shown so many wonderful passages in the bible that energize my spirit and love for theatre. Being an actor AND a Christian is never an easy thing. Heck, being a Christian is never an easy thing. If I said that I had never struggled with balancing both parts of my life I’d be lying. These past three weeks though God has shown me time and time again that I can, and how I can, combine the two in a beautiful way to glorify Him. My Christian walk and my faith has been renewed in the most wonderful way; this rehearsal period has blessed me with a cup overflowing with God’s grace and mercy.

The people that I have met these three weeks and the memories that I have made are ones that will last a lifetime. I already can’t imagine my life without these wonderful people in it. Special thanks to Erin and Travis, I don’t know what I or any of the other actors would do without you two. You constantly give of yourselves in order for things to move smoothly, I can’t think you enough for all you do. I have learned so much from you two alone in the past two weeks.

Amanda Bobo you have been a blessing in my life like you will never know. I am so thankful that God brought our paths together. This is a friendship that will always mean the world to me. I cannot wait to see how God uses you and your talents in the future. I will miss you so much this summer.

Meagan Mac! Girl you have been the best roommate a girl could ask for. I am so grateful that I had someone else who was thrown into this adventure as blind and scared as I was. I cannot even imagine life without you now. This summer is going to be unforgettable. Thank you so much for everything you’re always doing for me and everyone around you. I am so happy that you’re on my team and that we have many memories and adventures ahead of us.

It’s been a long and hard rehearsal period. I’ve had my moments of doubt and fear, of homesickness and loneliness, but as always God lifted me up and filled me with nothing but his joy and peace. And now, to embark upon another great journey. I am ready to hit the road and see what crazy, scary, amazing things God has in store for us. Please keep praying for continued strength, courage and safety.

I miss and love you all!

Hello! We meet again!

I know it has been awhile since my last post and for that I apologize. Things have been amazing. Great, wonderful, awesome, all of the above. We have been ridiculously busy blocking and filming and getting ready to hit the road in about two weeks. Getting to know all of the actors has been great and I know that I have already made life long friendships with some wonderful people here. Meagan, AC and I are having a blast getting to know each other and getting everything ready. God has definitely blessed me with some wonderful teammates and definitely knew what he was doing by placing us together. I can already tell that this summer will be full of amazing memories.

I do come to you with a major prayer request though. I have somehow managed to knock my neck out of place. Sounds pleasant, I know. Luckily I have an amazing event coordinator who set me up with a local chiropractor who has been fitting me in this week. I’ve been icing, heating and medicating but still dealing with a fair amount of pain and discomfort. I have no doubts that the Lord can and will heal me on his timing. I just pray for quick divine healing and for rest for myself and the entire production team.

All in all, things couldn’t be better. I have been greatly blessed by everyone at SL, from wonderful teammates to some great mentors who bring the word to us every day in a life changing way. I pray that we are able to truly be All Things to All People this summer.

I know this isn’t some great, deep writing but I wanted to let you know that I am alive and doing well. I promise to bring something more exciting very soon! Be sure to hit up my facebook and check out all the pictures that are going up! Until next time, I am off to spend some time with my good friend the ice pack. I love and miss you all!

And just for those interested, below is my schedule for the summer AND our mailing address if you feel sorry for me and want to keep me entertained with fun goodies from home :)

Covenant College:  May 29-June 2 ; June 2-6 ; June 7-11

Orange Beach:  June 13-17 ; June 17-21 ; June 21-25 ; June 25-28 ; June 28-July 2 ; July 5-9 ; July 9-13 ; July 13-17 

Liberty University:  July 19-23

Covenant College:  July 26-30 ; July 30-Aug. 3

Address:
Jordynn Poe
Aqua Team
PO Box 36040
Birmingham, Al 35236